Step 1

Ok,

So I feel like I'm pretty done with the first step of Getting your life back on track which is admitting that you have a problem. I have a problem. The problem is that i don't like myself very much or see much value in my self. This creates an amazing subset of problems but i feel like they are the symptoms and this is the root.

So once you realize you have a problem you typically move on to what needs to be done to fix the problem and then you do that. Unfortunately the issue at hand for me isn't as simple as I'm hungry or I'm lonely or I need to lose weight. If i knew what needed to be done to fix the problem i wouldn't be in this situation. Instead of concrete answers i have some vague general notion and at least for me i think instead of figuring out what needs to be done i just need to do it. It being anything at all that excites me or makes me happy or pushes me to grow or that i'm even a little bit interested. My motto for 2015 is more doing and less thinking and i'll admit my goal is to say yes to every invitation i receive.

I'm assuming that falling in love with yourself is a lot like falling in love with someone else. It happens without trying and when you lease expect it. My goal is to at the very least be busy enough to forget to loathe myself for awhile.

Tomorrow is saying yes to a root canal and an idea that I am going to take care of my teeth because i deserve not to be in pain and because my health is worth the immense and extreme financial burden.